Category: Devotional

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“Wisdom for Marriage” Part I

Proverbs Chapter 5: 1,3,4,8,9,10

1. My son, be attentive to my wisdom; incline your ear to my understanding

3. For the lips of a forbidden woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil,

4. but in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword.

8. Keep your way far from her, and do not go near the door of her house,

9. lest you give your honor to others and your years to the merciless,

10. lest strangers take their fill of your strength, and your labors go to the house of a foreigner

 

 

We have had two studies concerning the importance of our interpersonal relationships with each other, and we have learned that we are our “brother’s keeper.” We are held accountable to the degree that we are able, and that accountability is between God and us; therefore, aside from the importance of having a relationship with the Lord, where everything begins, our relationship with each other is critical.  Jesus was asked about the most important commandments—a great question, because by then, they had made commandments from commandments—and Jesus replied in Mark 12:29-31 saying (paraphrased):  “Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, soul, mind and strength and thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself.”  These two statements, in and of themselves, are a study, but they support the underlying point that the success or fruitfulness of our lives is underpinned in giving attention and time to the adherence of these two commandments.

 

I want to turn now from our relationship to one another and give time and learning to a critically important relationship—our closest “neighbor”—our spouse.  I have been married to Lisa for 34 years, and I will often tell others that I have her really fooled.  In this day and age, and considering we were married at the age of 22 (myself) and 21 (Lisa), we are a rarity and totally get the expression:  “poorer than church mice.”  In today’s society, we were but kids. Having our first child at ages 23 and 22, there was no time to “grow up.”  We just had to be. With all the struggles that come with life and raising a family, if we could make it, I am confident that any couple can make it, but they don’t.  Last I heard, statistics show there are as many divorces as marriages, and this does not account for the high percentage of people who are living together and in many cases raising families.

 

I know as we start this new series on marriage, I am going to “step on people’s toes”—people who are my friends; people who are dear to me. Yet, without a fraction of doubt in my heart, I irrevocably believe that God’s way is best and that there is no better action we can take or do than to align our lives in accordance with God’s Word. If this had not been the resolve of Lisa and me, it would be questionable whether we would be celebrating 35 years of marriage, nor could the fallout of a divorce be measured in the impact it would have had on our girls, which is seen in so many of our kids’ lives. Aside from our girls, we have “adopted” in heart another girl, Reyna, whom I have known, and to whom I have been a father figure, since she was 16 years old and who now is 30.  She in turn has cared for two children she has known since they were 3 and 5 years of age and who now are 11 and 13.  During Easter, they were at our home for dinner, and this was the first time we actually got to know the kids and interact with them. Given their lack of parental influence, they were a joy to have over, much to Reyna’s credit and influence.  Recently, Reyna and I were discussing how to answer the oldest one’s question about whether or not she should have sex—keep in mind she’s only 13 years old.  My initial response was to say that God has reserved sex for marriage.  Reyna interrupted me and said, “I don’t think they know what marriage is.  They could not believe that you and Lisa were married, especially for 34 years!  None of their friends come from homes with both parents.”  I almost cried.  What untold and immeasurable damage we “adults” are causing to the lives of our children by exercising “our freedom” to divorce and remarry, to break our marriage covenants, and in general live out our lives at the expense of our children. We use the excuse that we are incompatible, but when we got married, we were perfectly compatible! What happened? There are Biblical grounds for divorce, and even in these cases, counseling is strongly encouraged.

 

As we begin this series on “Wisdom for Marriage,” my heart is heavy and my words at times may be direct. Our kids should not be experiencing the fallout from our self-centered ways.  Many of us “adults” were raised in such environments and have not had healthy examples of marriage or being parents.  Consequently, though we try to do right by our kids, we come to marriage and parenthood with little or no tools.  My goal of this series is to equip us, and by God’s grace to right the wrongs we have suffered in our early lives.  For those of us who have had a relatively sound upbringing and, therefore, have had a healthy marriage and family life, may these devotions support and strengthen what you already have established.  I encourage you to send me emails on things that have helped your marriage and/or parenting skills, so the rest of us can benefit.  I am by no means coming to you as an authority, only as one who has seen God work in our marriage and with our girls, and I am still learning and face my own challenges.  This I know, however, that for the man or woman who honors God in his or her life decisions, God will honor, and the spinoff of that will be felt and seen in all of his or her relationships, especially in his or her family.

 

May this now serve as the introduction into this series and the point of reference from which I will be writing.  We will start next week with the verse quoted above.  Until then, may the love of God’s Word and your communion with Him in prayer become the bread you eat and the air you breathe.  Let’s be real.  Our families and spouses need us to be.

 

Father God,

I am not an authority on this subject, but may You teach through me what You have taught me. I can only give that which has been given to me. So, may Your wisdom come out and may marriages be healed; may families come together and may children know they are loved, as Your love comes into our relationships and heals and completes that which the enemy has sought to rob and destroy. This I ask of You Father.  Thank You and Amen.

 

Dios lo Bendiga – Arthur

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“Wisdom for Living” Part VII

 

 Proverbs 24:10-12:

10 If you faint in the day of adversity,

your strength is small.

11 jRescue those who are being taken away to death;

hold back those who are stumbling to the slaughter.

12    If you say, “Behold, we did not know this,”

does not he who weighs the heart perceive it?

Does not he who keeps watch over your soul know it,

and will he not repay man according to his work?

 

I have thought about these verses often—at first not really understanding them—but as life gave me more experiences, these “mystery verses” have become clearer.  This devotional, like the last one, will be challenging.  In context, Verse 10 references a time of trial:  “If you faint in the day of adversity, your strength is small.”  Adversity is defined as anguish or affliction, and faint is to become weak, to walk away, or to leave alone.  The verse references those times we should have stood up and said something or should have taken action on someone’s behalf, but we didn’t.  I believe we all share those regrets. There is a saying—not a proverb—that states:  “Unless you stand for something, you will fall for everything.”   Wefall or faint because our strength (character) is weak.  We are too worried about what others will say or will think of us, or we are too occupied with our own agenda to step out and do the right thing.  There are days of adversity that befall all of us, and these days measure our character, whether we live out our faith or personal belief, or we buckle under the pressure.  Natural disasters, such as the ones that occurred in Oklahoma, are one example of adversity.  Fortunately, in these extreme cases, the best of who we are appears, as we give ourselves to help others.  Verse 10 addresses this.

 

Verse 11 speaks of those falsely accused and sentenced to death because of a crime they did not commit:  “Rescue those who are being taken away to death; hold back those who are stumbling to the slaughter.”  We know the truth and we fail to speak out (forbear), allowing the innocent to suffer. One reason this verse is difficult for me is because my experience in these situations is extremely limited.  The closest I came were the years I taught in prison ministries.  I was very foreign to that environment, but I determined that God had my back and that I was going to do my best to teach these men the gospel.  It went well, and after my third year, I felt a couple of them could take over the study. In addition to prison ministries, we find many examples outside those walls where injustices are being perpetrated. Let’s look at a situation where a coworker is unjustly accused of something that someone else did, and we remain silent. What about when one of our classmates is being derided, and even if we do not participate, we do not attempt to stop it.  Character and strength is measured in times like these, and often the reason we don’t speak up is because of our own insecurities or fears that we will become the next target or become cast out from the group. The last part of Verse 11 gives caution to these thoughts.

 

Verse 12 speaks of the decision we must make regarding whether we conform to the group or societal norms, or whether we speak out because our conscience answers to God:  “If you say, ‘Behold, we did not know this,’ does not he who weighs the heart perceive it?  Does not he who keeps watch over your soul know it, and will he not repay man according to his work?”  No one can answer for the conscience of another, but God who sees will render to each man and woman the “harvest” of the deeds done and the words spoken. God help us to value Biblical truth in an age where everything but Biblical truth is believed.  May we live in such a way that our life becomes the scriptures that people read, and in so reading, may find a desire in themselves to know more.

 

Father God,

The salmon swim against the currents, and in so doing only the strong spawn; birds take off against the wind, and in so doing reach the heights; and for faith to be fortified, it too must be forged in times of trial and difficulty.  Help us to do the right thing in those moments when our character is tested, and help us to seek to be honoring to You.  At times, opportunities come only once.  Enable us to be the difference—to be Christ to that person. Thank you and Amen.

 

Dios lo Bendiga – Arthur

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“Wisdom for Living” Part VI

Proverbs 3:27-28:  “Withhold not good from them to whom it is due, when it is in the power of thine hand to do it.  Say not unto thy neighbor, ‘Go and come again, and tomorrow I will give it’ when thou hast it by thee.” 

Proverbs 24:17-18:  “Do not rejoice when your enemy falls, and do not let your heart be glad when he stumbles, lest the Lord see it and be displeased, and turn away His anger from him.”

 I have spent most of my life reading Proverbs, and the Proverbs have become “checks” to my soul, pointing out and uprooting weeds of negative thoughts and desires before they root themselves deeply in me and affect my character. At times, I am completely unaware of “bad weeds” beginning to make my soul their growing grounds, so subtle do the thoughts enter. The Spirit uses the scriptures, especially Proverbs, to reveal these “weeds” to me. Then I feel really stupid, but also so very grateful that the Lord is watching over me as He watches over all of us and speaks to us through His Word, as we commit to spending time with Him. Interestingly enough, there are 31 chapters in Proverbs and 31 days in a month, so a chapter can be read daily—like taking your “spiritual vitamin.” Between the clamor of the day and the constant bombardment of secular influences, it is refreshing to know that God’s Word “shoots straight,” no messing around, and it is completely trustworthy and for our good.

 

From our past devotions, we understand that God really cares about having a relationship with us, but with this week’s devotion, we see that God cares about the relationships we have with one another, even our attitude towards our “enemy.”  There is a neat story in 2 Kings 6:18-23, where Israel is at war, but the prophet Elisha would divinely warn the King of Israel of the Syrians’ traps. So angered by this, the Syrian King sent his army after Elisha, the prophet—really a stupid idea!  Long story short, the army found the prophet in a small town, but God blinded the army, and Elisha led them to the very heart of Israel where the King ruled, and the King requested permission to slay them.  Elisha responded, “How would you treat prisoners captured in war?  Feed them and send them back to their Master, the King?”  For a long time afterwards, Israel had peace with Syria.

 

It is so easy to rejoice over our enemy’s misfortune, but that is not the spirit God wants us to have. In Matthew 5:43-48, there are some great verses.  Because of its length, I can only quote parts of it, “But I say unto you, love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them who despitefully use you and persecute you, that ye may be the children of your Father who is in Heaven. For He makes His sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sends His rain on the just and the unjust. For if ye love those who love you, what reward have ye? And if you greet only your brethren, what do you do more than others?  Be ye therefore perfect (full—as in not lacking, matured, complete), even as your Heavenly Father is perfect.”  If you have not read these passages before, they are huge. It is so against our natural way of thinking towards those who would oppose us or dislike us.  

 

That’s why a truly Christian life is so much more than just saying a prayer and going to church on Sunday to “fulfill” a need in us, so we can say we are good people.”  True Christianity is way beyond that. It is not humanly possible, without the intervention of the Holy Spirit, to love our enemy.  Why should I?  He is my enemy.  Without understanding what a great offense for which we have been forgiven—so much so that the Savior had to give His life for us—we are unable to forgive and love our enemy. To be set free from our carnal nature, something with which we all struggle, has to be a God thing. This is the “raw, ugly” side of Christianity, the part that no one wants to talk about. We are all into doing good deeds and receiving praises from that, because it makes us feel good about ourselves, but we don’t want this “raw, ugly” side of the faith. It’s wounding.  It’s messy. I have to leave my nicely defined comfort zone, “my happy spot,” to step out and actually put flesh to Christ’s words. 

 

Christ gave a hard speech similar to this, and the scriptures record that many of His “followers” left Him. When we have to forgive, and when we have to say no to ourselves to obey Christ, do we also want to leave Him? He’s my God for the good times, and as long as things go my way and the blessings keep flowing, I am in; but when the blessings stop and times are really tough and someone is wanting to see what a Christian really is, do we check out and retreat back into our comfort zone of religion? The true Christian walk is supernatural. It cannot be done without the aid of the Spirit and a heart that truly is growing in the understanding of what it was saved from and the greatness of the ransom that was paid.

 

Father God,

This is a hard study, but you yourself say that wide is the road that leads to destruction, and many there be that go on it, but narrow (hard, confined—as if between two boulders) is the way that leads to eternal life and few there be that find it. Let me, let us, be the ones that find it and not count this life as precious, but the life to come. As diamonds in the rough, this life serves to prove us, cut us, and shape us, so that in our reflection, Christ is seen and more may come.  Amen. (Matthew 7:13-14 paraphrased)

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“Wisdom for Living” Part V

 Proverbs 3:13-15,18, 23: 

13  “Blessed is the one who finds wisdom, and the one who gets understanding, 14  for the gain from her is better than gain from silver and her profit better than gold.  15  She is more precious than jewels, and nothing you desire can compare with her.  18  She is a tree of life to those who lay hold of her; those who hold her fast are called blessed.  23  Then you will walk on your way securely, and your foot will not stumble.” (ESV)

Before we begin, please note the following corrections from prior studies.  In the scripture verse we studied last week, the word “loveth” incorrectly changed to “liveth.”  Correctly read would be:  “…for whom the Lord loveth he correcteth,” not “…for whom the Lord liveth….”  Also, two devotions back in the study of “Honoring the Lord with our Increase,” I misnamed the athlete as Mark Spitz, when it should have been Michael Phelps.  I am sure all of you realized that! 

Let’s start with a question, “What is wisdom, and how is it attained?”  Some would say it is being smart and that “smarts” come from our parents (our genes).  That part is true, but is intelligence the same as wisdom?  I have known some very intelligent people who have made some very poor decisions in life and have not exercised wisdom in their decisions. Personally, I think we all have made decisions that we regret.  So, wisdom must be more than just smarts and not just defined by one’s genes.  The scriptures teach in Proverbs 1:7:  “The reverence of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom.”  And it says in Proverbs 15:33:  “The fear of the Lord is instruction in wisdom….”  Both of these verses interchange the use of wisdom and knowledge for poetical reasons, but in either case, wisdom/knowledge stem from the fear or reverence for the Lord—that there is a God and to the degree that I believe that and act upon it will largely determine my behavior and the decisions I make.

Let me explain how reverence for the Lord works in me.  First, all my interactions with my fellow man are governed by a standard that is not “me” centered but “other” centered. Through the relationship I have with the Lord God, I know He “has my back,” so I do not need to be “me” focused—I can be focused on others.  If I did not have that reverence/relationship, I would by default need to be “me” focused.  Next, the fear of the Lord causes me to see my proper place among humanity. The value/love God places upon me, He has for everyone else as well, so it’s not just me that’s “special.” We are all special. So because of that, we all stand on equal ground and have equal worth and access before God. We can choose to not be obedient to Him or not have a relationship with Him and reap the consequences of our own decisions, but why when God is so willing to partner with us in this life? 

Lastly, the fear of the Lord affects how I use my finances. We spend money often times because we perceive our purchase will make us feel more important, look better, or fulfill an emotional need or void we have inside. Whereas, in reality, these purchases are just “things” that are made to serve a function, not inflate our ego or “fulfill us.” Through reverence/relationship with God, I am able to see through the things in this life that we tend to make into “little gods” and not be trapped by them or spend money on them other than for the service they were designed to do.

The fear of God makes God big, makes me small, and makes the problems in this life manageable.  We have said this before, but a reminder is always helpful. It allows me to see and weigh things with eternity in mind, which affects every decision I would make, from relationships to purchases; hence, from this then, is Wisdom founded. For the reverence of God causes these changes in one’s being, and wisdom is therefore that ability to live in the world, seek to be beneficial to all, but not get trapped or sucked into its materialistic, worldly views and values. To be in the world but not of it, to rather be about God’s work—having His values and living for something more than just the here and now—can only be accomplished through the fear/reverence of God. This, then, is wisdom, which is much different from “smarts.” Through our emotional-need system, our “smarts” can easily be duped into making something or someone more important than what/who they are.

Father God, thank you for this study. Cause me to understand how easily, via the window of my emotions and perceived needs, I can make decisions that are not the best. Let me see that by spending time with You, growing in reverence for You, I become “protected” from becoming prey to my emotions and the worldly system of materialism.  Thank you and Amen. 

Dios lo Bendiga – Arthur

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“Wisdom for Living” Part IV

Proverbs 3:11-12:  “My son, despise not the chastening of the Lord, neither be weary of his correction, for whom the Lord liveth he correcteth, even as a father, the son in whom he delighteth.“

The biggest error I find in “Christian faith” is that it is too easy.  Say a prayer and presto “you’re born again.”  We really have no concept of what it is to be a “Christian.”  It’s like saying all Hispanics are Catholic, and those of you who are Catholic understand that one’s nationality does not make you Catholic, no more than drinking milk makes you a cow.  It is a set of beliefs to which one gives himself/herself; therefore, just because we are Americans does not make us Christian.  The faith of Christianity was founded in Christ as he embraced the Cross for past, present, and future believers—for those who would seek forgiveness and refuge in His atoning death.  It was a victory that was hard-fought and won, as the principalities of Hell and Death sought to overcome the God/Man Savior.  Salvation, or to be “born again,” is, therefore, much more than a prayer said in a moment of emotion.  It is thoughtful, searching, and repentant, with an understanding of what is at stake—a surrendering of “me, mine, pride, and self,” to obey, follow, and fall in love with a God who loves us and paid the ultimate price for our freedom.  Without this foundational understanding, when God’s discipline comes, we are offended and fall away, causing more harm to ourselves and to the Faith.

It is necessary, therefore, that we understand the admonitions that are found in these verses. “My son” (‘Ben’ in Hebrew) can be translated “daughter or child ” as well, and as a father with two daughters, there are very few two-word combinations that express more love than “my daughter.”  So when I read “my son,” no matter what follows, it is being said from a heart that loves me and is proud of me—a heart that already approves of me, not a heart from which I have to earn approval.  His love validates my worth as His son, as His love validates your worth as a son or daughter. I have no fear, therefore, in what my Father allows, so to read “despise not the chastening of the Lord,”—understanding that “despise” means to reject, refuse, or lightly esteem and “chastening” to instruct or discipline—means that I accept it knowing that it is the refiners fire burning away the dross—dross that I know exists, until he sees His reflection in my soul.  Another one of my “best friends” since my youth is found in Proverbs 6:23: “For the commandment is a lamp, and the law is light, and reproofs (or disciplines) of instruction are the way of life….”  There is no argument in me towards God’s rod of instruction, only the prayer to be able to endure it, allowing it to have its work in me as the challenges of life come my way. I can fill pages with challenges, hardships, and times of darkness and uncertainty through which I have gone, only to learn the truth in the Shepherd’s Psalm (Psalm 23:4):  “Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.”

Tucked within the verse is, “even as a father,” which is a part that breaks my heart. The concept of God being a “Father” comes from us men, who, for the most part, are sorry examples of a Godly father. We have had fathers who failed in their roles as God’s representatives, and they have had fathers who failed in their roles, and on and on it goes.  Our children, therefore, have had to suffer the breakdown and have had to try to reconcile the God of the Bible as a “loving Father,” a God they cannot see, with their own father whom they do see whose role it is to instill worth and value but fails.  So, if my own father does not love me, does not feel I’m important enough, why would God find me important.  You see, when we fail as fathers, the breakdown is huge.  It is emotional, spiritual, and is often being acted out on the physical level.  Show me a child that has a poor self-image, and I will show you a child that is prey to sex, drugs, and high-risk actions, only to gain approval from his or her peers.  Fortunately, this is not true of all of us dads; it is just true of too many of us.  Our job as parents is huge, and single moms serving as a mom and dad is even greater still. The sense of self-worth, “that I matter,” comes from our parents, especially from us fathers, and to the degree we fail as parents is to the degree that our children will struggle with their sense of self-worth.  Just look at us!  It is to the degree that we still struggle, even now as adults. The “Love of God” is so “other” that unless you dwell in it, you can in no way model it or give it.  God help us parents, especially us fathers, to get it!

I love this phrase, “the son in whom he delighteth.”  In Hebrew, “Pasah” (delighteth), means to take pleasure in, to accept, to be acceptable, and to treat favorably. God’s love is not for sale. You cannot buy it and you cannot work for it.  You come into it only under God’s terms alone—you become His child, “the son/daughter in whom he delighteth.” This is hard to accept for those of us who still want to “make our way in this life” (a life that is so passing), but what a joy for those of us who are broken and hungry for truth—what a relief.”  You mean I don’t have to go through hoops to gain approval?  I am already approved though I have done nothing?”  Yes, the Love of God is “SO OTHER,” there is no human experience that it can be likened towards. The only one that possibly is close is the love of a parent towards their newborn. The child has not earned a thing; we don’t even know the child’s personality, and up to this point, it has caused a fair amount of pain and discomfort, but at the moment of birth, that child is given full rights into the family and all that we have achieved up to that point is appointed for their care.  Our response, therefore, to the Lord is one of surrender and acceptance of God’s love and to learn of Him, or go on our way chiseling out a life that hopefully will fulfill us, validate us, and fill the emptiness within.  It is our choice, and it will always be our choice.

Father God,

I now pray for everyone who has read this devotional.  I ask that the power and strength of this message will be irresistible to them, as you truly are irresistible.  Whatever concepts we have developed of you that do not line up with your words of love and encouragement, I pray they will crumble and become as dust.  Cause us to see that it is not about doing.  It is about being—being in communion and relationship with you. The doing is a natural by-product of being, just like an apple is the by-product of a healthy apple tree.  Please, Lord, help us to understand.  In your name,  Amen.

Dios lo Bendiga – Arthur

 

A friend of mine wrote the below poem entitled:  My Imaginary Dad.  She has shared with me the multiple psychological damages she has suffered due to never seeing or knowing her father.  She met him when she was 22 years old.  She also shared that when she became a believer in Jesus Christ, she was unable to call God “Father” due to the relationship or lack of relationship she had with her earthly father.  After much prayer and effort, she is now able to easily call God “Father” and “Dad,” and she knows that this God Father will never leave her or forsake her.

My Imaginary Dad

Where are you, my Imaginary Dad

One day I looked up and you were gone

You were always there in my youth

When I was feeling down, you were my friend

When I needed advice, you were my counselor

When I stumbled, you were there to offer your hand

You always knew the right words to cheer me

You always knew when I needed a hug to make me whole again

Yes, you were the perfect dad, and I was your beautiful little girl

But then you went away, my Imaginary Dad

My goal had been to find you; to know you; to be your little girl

And there you were, standing before me

But there was no elation—only an unexpected chill

You were, after all, just a man—a stranger among strangers

The vision was dead

It died many years before you, but the pain is no less now than then

One day they telephoned and said you were gone

They said you knew; you knew, but you did not call to say farewell

Quite apropos for a stranger; a stranger my real dad

A stranger in life; a stranger in death

 Written by Sandi E. Garrett

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“Wisdom for Living” Part III

Proverbs 3:9-10:  “Honor the Lord with thy substance and with the first fruits of all thine increase. So shall thy barns be filled with plenty, and thy presses shall burst out with new wine.”

 

The word “honor” (“Kabed” in the Hebrew) in this passage has an interesting rendering.  It means to “weigh down, weigh heavily, to be honored and/or to multiply.”  The best word picture I have is when Mark Spitz won his 22nd medal, making him the most decorated Olympian in history, with a total of 18 gold medals, 2 silver  medals, and 2 bronze medals in the 2012 Summer Olympics. You could say he was “weighed down, weighed heavily or honored” with his medals.  I believe this would be the correct rendering of the word “honor.”  The word “substance” would refer to the results or the effect of one’s labor.  In our society, it would reference money.  In an agrarian culture, it could literally refer to fruits, vegetables, grains, etc.  So substance would be the reward we receive for our efforts, and to coin a phrase, “This is where the rubber meets the road.”  How faith and finances find their expression through us—whether we honor the Lord with our substance—is most telling of our commitment to our faith.  Therein lies the biggest potential “gap” between what we profess and what we practice.  Now before I begin, I want to make it extremely clear that this is not a guilt trip. The issue of giving is between the believer and God.  So the goal of any good message on tithing or giving is to share what God’s Word says and for us individually to pray and consider our response to it.

 

There is a verse in the New Testament that has helped me keep a balance between family obligations, bills, and tithing/giving.  It is in 2 Corinthians 9:7:   “… for God loves a cheerful giver.”  This is a great chapter about tithing/giving.  Through my years of giving, I have learned that I have benefitted the most by giving what I can give gratefully, as opposed to tithing a specific amount.  I know that some of us have the conviction of giving 10 percent, and I would say that if that can be given cheerfully, as opposed to obligatorily, then that is awesome.  Some of us give more than 10 percent and some give less.  Regardless of the amount, if it is given cheerfully, then that is what counts.  We have to remember, God isn’t going to file Chapter 11.  He does not need our money, and He is bigger than our wallets.  Giving, therefore, is more like investing.  If I believe in a company’s principles, and I want to be a part of its future growth, I invest in it.  I am confident that I will see a return on “my money” (all money is the Lord’s) as the company expands.  Giving, therefore, is for my benefit, “So shall thy barns be filled with plenty and thy presses burst out with new wine.”  Giving also measures our obedience, which is in direct proportion to our faith.  So, to the degree that our faith is centric to our being, we give to support those ministries which will bring the “return” (people’s lives benefitted) that we seek.

 

A stumbling block to giving is the “psychology of money,” which can only be overcome by growing faith.  Inherent within us is the need to feel secure; therefore, the more money we have, the more secure we feel, but is that true?  Does money make for a good marriage, prevent divorce, give us wisdom to raise our kids, or enable us to forgive?  The answer is, “No.”  In fact, in many instances, having money (wealth, and wealth is relative) makes the heart more selfish and self-centered, exasperating all the problems inherent to having relationships. There are neat verses in Proverbs 30:8-9:  “…give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with food that is appropriate for me, less I be full and deny you and say, ‘Who is the LORD?’ or lest I be poor and steal and profane the name of my God.”  The man who wrote this lived in the “golden age” of Israel’s history, where “silver and gold was as common as the rocks in the streets.”  He saw through the vanity of trusting wealth for one’s security and happiness, and he understood that a living relationship with the Living God is what true wealth and security is all about.

 

Therefore, as our faith matures, we understand this truth and seek our security from the Lord and not from money.  Also, as our faith grows, we desire to faithfully use what God has blessed us with—be it our time, money, or both—and we are joyful to share or “partake” in the success of the ministries we support.  Internal to my being is the desire to be pleasing to my Heavenly Father.  To be able to stand before Him, knowing that I have served Him well with my (His) time and my (His) finances, and knowing I have loved His kids and my neighbors—there is nothing greater or worth striving for.  As Paul said in 2 Timothy 4:7:  “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.  Henceforth there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, will award to me on that Day, and not only to me but also to all who have loved his appearing.”  Paul got it right and lived it with his life.  May he be an inspiration to all of us.  As one pastor said, “It is not the amount given but what is left.”  That amount is between God and the giver.

 

Father God,

Thank you for this study on finances and how it is a measurement of my trust and faith in You.  Help me to grow my faith by spending time with You in study and prayer.  Open my eyes to see that the only true security is in You, and though money may make me feel secure, it also affects my relationship with You, making me more complacent towards You.  So “feed me with the food that is appropriate for me” and free me to focus on You.  Thank you and Amen.

 

Dios lo Bendiga – Arthur

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“Wisdom for Living” Part II

Proverbs 3:7&8:  “Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and depart from evil. It shall be health to thy navel and marrow to thy bones.”

Very strange use of words—expressions not common to us. Let’s define these words. To be wise in my own eyes sounds like I have a healthy self-image. What the verse is implying is more akin to our terms conceited, prideful, self-reliant, etc.  While the first two terms are annoying, the third—self-reliant—is esteemed in our culture.  It is viewed as a positive; however, when an individual, because of his or her “wisdom” or “self-reliance,” fails to see the greatness of God and his or her own need of Him, then these attributes have become marred. An individual with true wisdom “fears” the Lord, meaning to give Him “reverence” or to “revere” Him.  To see Him as Creator and Lord is to have true wisdom. Anything less is not as great as the purpose for which God gave man and woman his and her ability to reason, think, and ponder.  To have the wisdom, therefore, that causes us to see God as God with reverence for Him is true wisdom. He is the center of the universe, not us. He deserves our worship, not us.  In like manner, he holds our every breath, not us. This is the fruit of true wisdom, and it leads us “to depart from evil.”

In this context, evil originates spiritually, affects us morally, and then is acted out in the physical arena of life. Just like the bad fruit on a tree is not the fault of the fruit but of the tree—down into the roots—so evil, whether it is an immoral thought or a terrible action, originates from deep within, resulting from a disconnect with a Holy God. Not to have reverence for God is not to recognize His rightful claim over us as Creator, Lord, and Father. To lack this, therefore, means that we are the judge and jury of our lives, determining what we believe is right or wrong. There is a proverb that is rather sobering, “There is a way which seems right unto a man, but the end thereof is death.” This is a proverb that literally freaked me out as a young man. How is it that I can believe I am doing the right things but find out, when it’s too late, that I missed the mark?  Was this some cruel joke where God changed the rules and did not tell anyone? These were my early thoughts before I learned about Christ and His sacrifice, so that we could be redeemed from our own sinful nature’s inability to truly follow God’s laws. Once I understood and saw His sacrificial action to redeem me, then it became clear that He is a God of great love and that it is up to me to accept or reject His offer of salvation. The action of rejecting His rightful claim over us is the very core and root of sin. Spiritually speaking, this poisons the soul, because from this comes all that is immoral, prideful, and self-focused.

In context, therefore, a correct relationship with a Holy God causes in me a desire to be holy. Just like children growinWig up want to be like their parents, so I want (we should want) to be like my Heavenly Father. Though this takes time, and often we fall short, the Holy Spirit is like a steady stream of righteousness that if given His time with us will wash away all that is not holy and replace it with the graces of the Spirit.  It’s not “rocket science.”  It’s “relational science” (to invent a phrase). The more time I spend with Him, the more I become like Him, and “it shall be health to my navel and marrow to my bones.” This is an unusual way, at least to us, to say that strength and health—spiritual, emotional, and physical—will grow in us. The “navel” and “marrow” were considered sources of life and strength in the Hebrew culture, and though these are unusual choices of words, one can understand the reasoning behind it.

The nature of sin in us tears us down through the years due to our having to justify our actions and deal with a guilty conscience or ignore it until it no longer speaks.  These are all negative effects (and there are many more) of being ruled by our sinful nature. So why would we not want righteousness or right living according to God’s design for our life?  Remember the proverb, “There is a way that seems right unto a man, but the end thereof is death.” Just as a blind man cannot see the physical world, we are spiritually blinded without the insight of the Holy Spirit and cannot see or comprehend the “expanse of God” and His righteousness. So we are in need of His help, for no man or woman can live a life that mirrors the holiness of God. We all fall short. His life must be infused within us via faith in Christ’s atonement for us—something we have discussed many times. As someone very close to me said, “I can hear the same message all my life and not get it, but one day, when it is said just a little differently and when my heart is quieted, I hear it and it makes sense.” So repetition is useful because our journeys are all unique.

Father God,

Help me to understand that whatever wisdom I might attain, it is nothing in comparison to the wisdom of God. True wisdom makes You big and makes me small.  A big God equals smaller problems.  A big me and a small God equals larger problems. I am more free when You are big and I am small. Also thank you that when I see us being big, as in times of crisis when we think of others first, I see how we were “created in your image” and were meant to live. Please give strength and hope to those families who lost their loved ones in these recent tragedies. Thank you and Amen.

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“Wisdom for Living” Part I

Proverbs 3:1-2:  “My son (or daughter), forget not my law, but let thine heart keep my commandments, for length of days and long life and peace shalt they add to thee.”

We are going to start a new series in the Book of Proverbs, starting with my favorite verse of all scripture.  The one we just read sets the stage for us, as we read King Solomon’s advice to his son—instructions that I personally have sown into the fabric of my life since my youth. The verses that we will study during this series have been my teachers, counselors, and trusted friends.

Proverbs 3:5-6:  “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thy own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and he shall direct thy paths.”

The definition of some key words will bring insight into these verses. To “trust” is to confide in someone to the extent that all worry or care is removed. It implies an intimate knowledge of that person that you are trusting. Said in the reverse, it is hard, if not impossible, to trust someone you do not know. There are also levels of trust. The extent to which I would trust a friend is not to the same level that I would trust my wife. The use of trust in this verse implies the deepest of all levels, “with all thine heart.”  This is complete transparency, where all fears, joys, and concerns are shared. This is even beyond the level I would have with my wife. As most of us know, incidents or concerns happen in life that would cause our spouses to worry. So, at any given time, there could be one or two things that are weighing on me that I would only bring to the Lord, until I have more clarity, or I can see the issue being resolved before I would share it without causing undue worry.  So my transparency level is 110 percent with the Lord, meaning that my relationship with Him is “tight,” to use common language. If you struggle with trusting the Lord, ask yourself, “How much time do I spend in prayer or reading the scriptures?”  If it is little to no time, then that is your root cause of lacking faith to trust Him. Simply put, you don’t know Him. Relationships are built through time spent together. We know that, yet for some reason, we do not apply that same knowledge to our walk with God. Both God, who longs to share His life with us, and us miss out by not taking at least 20 minutes a day to read and quiet ourselves before Him.

I used to spend time trying to figure out how a problem could be resolved, leaning (or relying) on my own understanding, and hence seeking to resolve it myself. I have learned many times over that it is a waste of time and emotional energy. As my relationship with the Lord deepened, I found it much easier to just pray about the concern and leave it with Him. It’s like a mouse trying to carry the “burdens of the world,” while this huge elephant is just waiting for you to give him the burden—a burden that is nothing for him. So leaning on my own understanding—seeing maybe one or two ways that a problem could work out based on my limited resources, compared to God’s infinite ways a problem could be resolved because His resources are limitless—was not wise.

To “acknowledge God in all thy ways” could be different for each of us. For me, I have developed the habit of praying before I start the day, praying before I start a new landscape job, praying as we move through the phases to completion, praying before I meet my next appointment, and praying as I feel the burdens or stresses of work and life weighing me down. I have learned to step back from life and to see it from God’s perspective and have often realized that things are not as serious or as hopeless as they initially appear—that with God in the equation, there is much hope. And in those moments that life is extremely serious—illnesses or accidents, especially involving our children—faith in God’s ability to conquer such moments is critical. From where will our children find hope if they do not see it in us first?  Remember, He promised, “He shall direct (to make straight) thy paths.” That is a promise, and just as sure as we do not see the sun behind the storm, even though it is there, so it is with God. Whatever the storm, know that God is bigger still.  In difficult times, I quiet my soul and start listening to what He would say, or look for circumstances to unfold during my day to get an idea of what He is doing but mixing the “unknown” with the confidence that one way or another, he is guiding me—this keeps me very positive. He also knows how to get my attention, especially when I am “tuned in” to seeking his guidance. Life then becomes more like an adventure. I used to read Nancy Drew and the Hardy Boys in Junior High, and they were always going on these adventures.  Mystery and intrigue were involved in solving each case. Life with God, especially if praying for others is part of your life, is like that. As mentioned, life can become very serious. You and/or people you know could be diagnosed with cancer; couples (friends) could be contemplating divorce; you could be helping a young person who has been mistreated by his/her parents; you could just be trying to get your own kids through the school system morally intact; or you could be working on your marriage. All aforementioned problems are serious challenges—life changing and potentially scary—but I have learned that God’s love and ability to make right the wrongs in this life far exceeds all the pain and “junk” that comes at us. As Joseph in the Old Testament said to his brothers, “You meant it for evil, but God used it for good.”  With Him in the equation, the answer is not hopeless but extremely hopeful. I will end my journey here, not only a much better man than I would otherwise have become, but a sanctified and a redeemed man. Those whom I am blessed to influence and help will as well, as the life of Christ in me is infused into their life and faith. It’s a win-win situation, and I love that!  And it can be the same for you!

Father God,

We can wonder at the beauty of life by taking You by the hand, or we can see all the ugly and sad things and fear. It’s the same field of vision.  The only difference is with one, I am alone, and with the other, I have you teaching me to see life through your eyes—to view life knowing that in You all wrongs will be made right in your love; therefore, help me to always choose you. Thank you and Amen.

Dios lo Bendiga – Arthur

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“The Greatest Gift” Part III

Matthew 27:50-52 & 54: “And Jesus again cried out with a loud voice and yielded up his spirit…and the earth did quake, and the rocks rent (split). The graves were opened and many bodies of the saints which slept arose…. Now when the Centurion and they that were with him, keeping watch over Jesus, saw the earthquake and those things that were done, they feared greatly (vehemently terrified) and said, ‘Truly (as in a fact), this was the Son of God.’”

Matthew 28:1-4 & 11-15: “At the end of the Sabbath, towards the dawn of the first day of the week (Sunday), came Mary Magdalene and the other Mary (Jesus’s mother) to see the tomb, and behold, there was a great earthquake….  And the stone (sealing the tomb) was rolled away, and an angel sat upon it. His countenance was like lighting, and his clothing white as snow.  And for fear of him, the soldiers did shake (tremble for fear) and became as dead (corpse) men. Later that morning (after the event, they revived), some of the soldiers returned and told the Pharisees what had occurred.  They (the Pharisees) gave a large sum of money to the soldiers and said, ‘Tell people, His disciples came by night and stole him away while we were asleep,’ and the soldiers took the money and did as they were directed.” (somewhat paraphrased)

This study is unavoidably personal to me, so please forgive my emotions. This story can be entitled, “The tale of two hearts.” The soldiers, whose hearts were harded and calloused by war, yet acknowledged Christ as the Son of God, and the Pharisees, who were supposed to be God’s representatives—leading the people in ways of truth and faith—fully knowing the occurrences at the Cross and in addition hearing the report of the soldiers from the tomb, refused to believe in Christ as their Messiah. Rather, they paid off the soldiers so that they would lie—a lie that would surely cost the soldiers their life for falling asleep at their post. Also disappointing is that truth could be bought. How hard can the human heart become—like cement: that all truth, as water, just rolls off of it; that for the love and praise of the people, the Pharisees held on tenaciously to their positions of power. Engulfed in pride, and so in love with themselves, they failed to lead the people in paths of righteousness, and utterly and shamefully missed their most important calling—to point the people to their Messiah.

To live in such times and to not believe that which one can see with their own eyes and hear with their own ears is astounding to me, but what about today?  Does time change truth? Just because these things occurred approximately two thousand years ago, does it make it less factual or does it erase these occurrences and their significance from history? Gravity is as old as the world, and yet it is just as relevant today as it was then. The tides of the oceans are equally as old, and we believe in them. Why then is the question of faith different? Just as in the days of Christ, the Pharisees had a choice, and they chose not to believe. We have the same choice and are faced with the same question, “Do we believe?”  With gravity, there is no choice; if you chose not to believe, the consequences are immediate and painful. With the tides, it is the same thing. I enjoy running on the beach near a bed and breakfast we go to from time to time. When the tide is in, most of the beach is underwater. If I was not mindful of the tide, I could potentially become trapped or end up swimming.

So, why is faith different?  Is it because the “consequences” are delayed? To think of faith in terms of “consequences,” as one would with gravity and ocean tides, is an incorrect understanding of faith. Faith is likened more to our relationships. We seek to be in relationships, because we enjoy having companionship. They add to our life, because we like to do things with our spouse, etc.  It is not fundamentally based on “consequences,” but on a desire to have companionship with others and to love and be loved. Faith is the same. Factually, all the evidence of Christ existence—his miracles, the crucifixion, his appearances afterwards, including his resurrection—is all there, recorded for us and verified in other historical books such as with the historian, Josephus. So, evidence is there, yet even with evidence, the Pharisees refused to believe, as many of us do today. Our sense of pride and our unwillingness to seek forgiveness and to forsake the passions (idols) of this world, is that which separates us from the Creator and Savior of our soul.

Jesus said in John 14:6: “I am the way, and the truth, and the life.  No one comes to the Father except through me.” This statement alone has angered many, but what religion or prophet has ever made the claim to redeem man from his sins by his own blood? What prophet has done the miracles, risen from the dead, appeared to many afterwards, ascended unto heaven and then infused his believers with the Holy Spirit? There is none. Christ alone has redeemed man. Our choice is to believe or not to believe. To believe because we fear the consequences is the wrong motive, but to believe because we seek to be in a relationship with our Heavenly Father is the correct and only motive. God help us to see clearly, understanding that though the Cross speaks of our need to repent, it shouts out of the LOVE that put Jesus there for our redemption.

Father God,

I do not want a calloused heart—a heart that only thinks of its temporal good. Grant me a noble heart—one that seeks truth, even if it means sacrificing my pride and the castles and idols I have built for myself. To really live life in fellowship with the God who created life and who loves me is, and will always be, the right choice. Thank you and Amen.

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“The Greatest Gift” Part II

As I again read the gospel account of Christ’s passion for myself, two more truths seem so relevant that I wanted to share them.

Matthew 26:31:  “Then, Jesus said unto the disciples, all ye shall be offended because of me this night. For it is written, I will smite the shepherd and the sheep shall flee.”  Vs.33:  “Peter answered and said, though all men shall be offended because of thee, yet will I never be offended.”  Vs.34:  “Jesus said to Peter, this night, Peter, before the rooster crows, you will have denied me three times.” “Peter said, though I should die with thee, I will never deny thee. And all the others said the same.”

We know from the gospel accounts that Peter did deny the Lord, as did all the other disciples, except for John. We also know that upon hearing the rooster crow three times, Peter realized that Jesus’s words came true; that he had denied the man that he swore he would be willing to die for, and the accounts read, “And he went out and wept bitterly (Luke 22:61).”  What happened?  Did Peter, as well as the other disciples, lie, or do we really lack knowledge of ourselves? I do not believe that the disciples lied—they meant it.  So, what happened?  Do we, like them, believe we can predict our actions in a given situation? Can we really be so sure of ourselves? I believe that until we actually face the challenge, we really don’t know our response. There is a saying that is fairly accurate, “Until the fire burns, we really do not know its pain or our response to it.”  Trials, difficulties, and frustrations introduce ourselves to ourselves. That may sound a little strange, but what about our phrase, “Oh, I’m so sorry. I really didn’t mean to say that or do that.”  What about our own sense of personal wrong, whether the action occurred at work or at home?  We do not know ourselves as well as we think we do.  King David prayed this prayer, “Search me, Oh Lord, and know my ways and see if there be any wickedness within me.”  David acknowledged a gap in his knowledge of himself, and later he asked the Lord, “Heal my ways.”  These are both great prayers.

Do you think that the Lord was disappointed or angry at Peter for denying him, for surely he was not “the Rock” that Christ had named him prior? By all appearances, Peter failed. There is an intimate exchange between Peter and Jesus in John 21, after the resurrection. The disciples went fishing per Peter’s suggestion, toiled all night catching nothing, and as they were coming in from a frustrating night, Jesus, unrecognized by them, called out to them to cast out their net on the right side of their boat. With the sun rising, causing the fish to go out into deeper water, this was a foolish suggestion. Their net only caught surface fish, but they did it—maybe with a flicker of hope and against their better knowledge. The account reads, “So they cast it (their net), and now they were not able to haul it in, because of the quantity of fish. That disciple (most likely was John), whom Jesus loved, therefore said to Peter, ‘It is the Lord!'”  From a fisherman’s perspective, this was a miracle—sun equals no fish. That was the rule by which they lived. What was Jesus saying to them? What is Jesus saying to us? We are not fishermen, but work is work, and failure is common to us all, so what can we learn?

There is still one more part to this before we can draw application. Once the men were at shore with their catch, they find Jesus around a fire with fish already cooking and bread warming. Jesus invited them to sit down and eat. This is now the third time Jesus had appeared to them after his physical death. After they had eaten, Jesus has a very specific dialogue with Peter. It appears on the surface that Jesus is asking the same question three times, but is he?  “Simon (using his prior name), do you love (Agapao: self-sacrificing love) me more than these (maybe referring to the other disciples or maybe pointing to the fish, representing his career)?  Peter said, “Yes, Lord; you know that I love you (Phileo: love you as a friend).”  Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.”  This goes on two more times and by the third time, it says, “Peter was grieved (to afflict with sorrow) and said, ‘Lord thou knowest everything; thou knowest that I Phileo you.'”  Prior to Peter’s response and the reason why Peter was so grieved was when Jesus asked the third time, he changed the word Agapao, a superior love, to Phileo, and in a sense asked, “Do you really even Phileo me?” Now, we can understand why Peter was grieved. It is bad enough to know you failed, but to have the one thing you believe you are sure of brought into question is to make the failure that much more pronounced. Yet, given Peter’s failure, Jesus does not change his response to Peter. He still says, “Feed my lambs.”

Let’s make application. Often when we fail, we get labelled or label ourselves, or an opportunity is missed because of our failure. With Christ, failure is our entrance into Divine Grace—the beginning of a walk built on trust, not works. It is no longer what I can do for God or what I can do by my strength, because I know I can’t. I failed, and more than likely will fail again. If I am to be pleasing to God, it is now what he can do through me. All I can give him is a willing vessel, and I am not even sure of that. Failure causes humility; humility causes dependence upon the arm of the Spirit, not the arm of the flesh. And failure makes Grace that much more precious. How do you think Peter felt, when even in his failure, Jesus calling upon him does not change, “Even if you just Phileo me Peter, and questionable at that, still feed my lambs.” Peter preached the first sermon of the church in an open square and 3,000 people were converted—from failure to victory; from trusting in my ability to trusting in God’s ability through me. We must learn that this is the path of faith—the path of victory.

Father God,

Thank you for Peter’s failure, for in it I see myself, and in it, I see your love, noncondemning but always pressing us forward to mature faith. Let me learn to get out of the way and yield to you a willing heart and mind for you to use. Thank you and Amen.